LAP OF LIFE..

So many people around, I feel intimidated…

So many losers around, I feel lost…

So much beauty around, I feel deprived…

So much intrigues me, I feel confused…

Temptations lure me, I lose my way…

Discontent with my past, Lost in the present,

Worried about the future…

Wondered…

Whether life’s just a dream...or a nightmare…!!

I started running, I wanted to break free from this body…

Or probably, I wanted to tame it…

Whatever it meant, I was trying to silence my mind…

Blabbering in chaos, So that I could feel peace…

Within… and Outside…!!

Thoughts cringe me, pulling me back, As I gasped for life and kept running…

Was it compulsion or my choice..??

Whatever it is, just kept running…!!

Flickering thoughts… Money..Desires..Fame.. Chase me…

I run away, for a reason I don’t know…

Silence dawns.. Lake is silent..I seem to hold the track and make sense of my journey…

The passing woods make me think…

”Does life run through me or I run through life or have we both run into each other..??

 Without a purpose..!!

We breathe all the time, every moment we live, But now I am actually breathing...

Senses come alive, Wind breezed pass my ears, Sweat blinds my sight, Heart pounds with an upbeat…

And Exhilaration…

For more…more life…!!

As I sustained my breath, loneliness gripped me…

I was alone…All alone..!!

I was related to no one, just me and my path…

Leading to a goal, which I was unaware of…

I felt inspired as the journey tasted me and I told myself to edge on…

And keep running…!!

There was no one around to relate to...and feel burdened…

Running helped me…!!

Empty my mind and feel the silence, of this emptiness...!!

It gave me answers without words, It made sense without any reason...

I hadn't realized yet, the Journey had not yet begun…

It doesn't begin on flat terrains…

It begins where one has to rise and keep climbing…

The slopes of challenge…!!

And many a few don’t foresee it, and give in along the way…

Pain is real on the slope..!!

I need to speed up and not just to go the distance…

As the summit approaches, many realize…

Life’s battles are lost by your mind…

But won by your heart...

And on this peak, one sees the past…

A race of mind, as the grind begins…

Scramble of feet, Laps pass by…

Time runs slow, pain floods your senses…

And in a blink, the battle is lost..!!

When you lay down defeated, feeling worthless and vulnerable…

Even that brief brush of innocence drenches you with joy..!!

And you feel this pure bliss, probably for the first time in your life…

And you don’t even know, WHY…

Sometimes I wish, that I had never grown up,

To get caught in this lure of life, and had forever stayed,

In this childish oblivion and aimless wilderness…!!

Floating around like the free spirit, hoping to stay afloat...forever…

But then you realize that you can only wish..!!

Love…Desire…Hope…

The chase is always on, this race never ends…

In fact it takes one whole lifetime…

So is it the end?? Not at all…

Because the lap of life has just begun..!!

There are many times I questioned my existence…

The purpose of my life…Why am I here..??...

 I wonder if life’s like a puff of smoke...

Arising out of nowhere and going nowhere…

All I can do is to rise with it and rise as high as I can…

And...Disappear..!!


Love, 
Utk..